So a lot has happened that I really don't feel like getting into... So I'll just summarize the last couple months in just a few short sentences that'll leave you with invisible question marks around your head. Yeah.
Okay, so in August (specifically like the 29th or the 30th) I got a letter of admission from York. I know, late, right? I guess they just needed more failures to suck money from. And that changed my plans for work and... basically everything. I told my manager that I didn't have full availability anymore, and, as a result, he couldn't hire me—but he recommended me to another manager who did, but was farther away. So, long story short, I'm now one in 75 people studying engineering as a major in York University, while having a part-time job as a cashier at Shoppers.
And now onto the main rant of the day.
I hate being a cashier. I really do.
I was so much better as a merchandiser. I could stock and fill shelves, direct customers to certain items, put labels on products, and do plan-o-grams like a pro.
I suck as a cashier. Let me just say this once: I'm not good at multi-tasking. But, in Shoppers, traditionally, a merchandiser is a guy's job, and a cashier is a girl's job. Seriously. In all the months I've worked there, I've never seen a single girl merchandiser. They're all guys. I can understand, though. It's not sexist; it's just pragmatic. Merchandisers have to lift really heavy stuff. Like really heavy stuff. I've seen guy cashiers, though. So I guess I can't accuse Shoppers of sexism. It's just really unfair, though.
I know, from years of personal experience, I'm better at doing traditional guy stuff than girl stuff. I mean, you wouldn't know to look it. I look like your typical girl, that isn't tomboy-ish or anything—I don't like sports, I don't work out, and I wear makeup on a regular basis. Although I do have to get my sister's approval of my outfit before I walk out the door. But that's mainly because my fashion style is a bit... out there. I'm not very colour-coordinated.
But ask me to drill curtain rods for you above the kitchen window or make that new shelf you just bought, and I can do it in a flash. Ask me to make you even a piece of toast... and I'll probably burn it. I do try to cook. It's not that I'm lazy or anything. Okay, well yeah, I'm really lazy. But I do try when I get really hungry. And I can't count the number of times the smoke alarm went off because I forgot to take the bread out of the toaster. Sigh. My brother can cook better than me. I can never understand how people can tell when something's cooked! I mean, the other day, my sister declared some meatballs cooked and others not—but they all looked exactly the same!
However, most of the handy-work around my home has been done by me. I was the one who drilled the curtain rods for my room, my sister's room, my mom's room, the sitting room, and the kitchen. I was the one who installed the blinds for the kitchen, and I was the one who built both of my sister's shelves. I was the one who installed both the towel holder for the basement and the toilet paper holder for the bathroom. I was the one who rebuilt both my sister's and my mom's bed frames (after we collapsed them when moving), helped my brother with his, and built the computer desk (not to mention my own desk, and my sister's desk). I was the one who set up and lubed the treadmill, and built the ottoman for the sitting room.
Sadly, my brother has a reputation for not doing shit that doesn't benefit him directly, and disappearing when work needs to be done. Although he did paint the whole house, and built the walls for his basement room... but, again, that was for himself.
So... where was I? Oh, yeah. The thing with being a cashier at Shoppers is that you have to be good at multi-tasking, which is, traditionally, a girl's role, but one that I suck at tremendously. I'm constantly making mistakes. But there's so much you have to keep track of! You have to know the codes for different coupons (retailer's or the store's, free or a discount), how to put in lottery codes (wins for offline or online, or purchases), when it's not busy, you have to fill the candies at the front and do facing, and, most importantly, you have to count money. Which I suck at, because I have to keep track of everything else, and then I miscount, and then I'm either short or over on my till, which I don't count until the end of the day, which just builds up to being really stressful... and I just do badly at it.
I'm always either short or over for my till. It's never perfect. In fact, my manager even talked to me about it.
God, I hate minimum wage jobs, and all the multi-tasking bullshit you have to do for it. All I know for certain is, this job's not going to last long, the way it's going. And it'll be my third job that I've failed at in a year. I wish I could think that it's other people—that I just need to find my niche, but I just feel like a failure right now.
All I know is, in the future, I have to avoid cashier jobs like crazy, even though it's the only thing I have a lot of experience in. I mean, a job's a job, and I know, if I get hired anywhere else, it'll likely be for a cashier position, but I have to get out of this destructive cycle.
And I'm dreading Boxing Day, because I'll have to work, and I know my manager's going to want to talk to me again because I was short ten dollars last time.
I just wish they'd just fire me already, so I can get this anxious feeling over with.
